Time is something that is not given to me a lot. So much time I wish I could stop to do all the things I want to do and I hope that one day all my dreams could come to fruition. One of those is to write a book. I have so many series in my head that I don’t know which one to pursue. Right now it’s about a cyber punk future of a human working in a machine factory contemplating to either accept his slave-like existence or ‘improve’ himself by becoming synthetic. Joining the future that many humans have shunned or deemed “unnatural”. These humans were pushed to the bottom pile. They work in the slums they work in the dark. They are the underground.
**RANDOM RANT HERE**
Why the fuck to a get ‘p’ and ‘b’ mixed up? Do I have some form of dyslexia? Every time I go to write a ‘p’ or ‘b’ I write them opposite. Like for instance ‘cyber’. I will write it ‘cyper’ and have to go back and correct it. I’ve had this since forever. And it’s annoying. Same thing with numbers. Sometimes I see 23 as 32. It’s annoying. Ugh.. Anyway.
**END RANDOM RANT**
Back to my job. My job is horrible. I hate it. I am only there for the paycheck and that is it. It’s a stepping stone to my major career. It’s a period before my college career where I’m studying and doing tests 24/7 and this job is NOT my future. It’s a factory. I feel like a drone. An easily replaced ant. Working nonstop doing the same thing 5 days in a row for 10 hours a day. It’s monotonous. This place could replace me in a heartbeat and don’t seem to care at all. I’m a number. An expendable. A worker ant in a massive colony of uncaring insects. I am so excited for college. I am so excited to get a part-time job. Yes it will be less money but I will be in school by then and I’ll be working for a degree so I can get a better job. I would be so happy to get paid to do something that I love. College will help me obtain that.
Time is unfortunately not on my side. Spending time with my wifey, making music, and writing. They’re all being pushed a side by a factory. By a job that I won’t be at in the next month. Is it worth it? Is it worth it to miss out on a month of things that I enjoy and the woman I love? It’s killing me honestly. It’s pushing me to the very edge and reminding me that these jobs are just jobs. Not a career. Anyone who thinks this is, well, kudos for you. Someone has to do the monotonous jobs. I’m moving on soon, I hope, to college. Getting a career done.
Here’s some of my songs that are going in my playlist. The main ones I have on loop:
- Invisible Wounds (Sulture Remix) by Fear Factory
- Resurrection (T.L.A. Big Rock Mix) by Fear Factory
- Decent (Falling Deeper Mix) by Fear Factory
- Archetype by Fear Factory
- Stand by Machinae Supremacy
- Dark City by Machinae Supremacy
- Reanimator by Machinae Supremacy
- Ghost (Beneath The Surface) by Machinae Supremacy